INVESTING

A day watching the news whores, er, hounds was quite sufficent. The trumptimng of perspective over substance was quite disconcerting. Surely such a self serving people would be disruptive if allowed to prosper in a galactic environment. An argument, to be sure, that we should let disaster befall, I think.
I did notice one channel with a different focus. Perhaps there was some hope.
One channel devoted itself to business and investing.
I had spent some time watching these shows. I must say that I found the monkey boys very creative in the various things they concocted. I suspected it was so investment managers could charge fees to handle, what is that phrase, Other People's Money.
Stocks, bonds, real estate investment trusts, exchange traded funds, mutual funds, closed end funds, spiders, index funds, funds of funds, cinvertible bonds, hedge funds, covered calls,naked calls, covered puts, naked puts, options, futures, going long. short selling, baskets of stocks (popular around Easter?).
It sounded like one big casino. Colored lights that hypnotize.
I decided to see what my monkey boy host thought of it all.
I went to see Jim. As usual during the day he was the only one home. He had been putting things up for sale on a site called Ebay. Selling on this electronic garage sale was how he earned money.
"C'mon in," he invited. " Have a seat.What can I do for you?'
I settled into the couch while he took his big chair.
"Actually,I need some advise,' I comfided. " I have some money I would like to invest but there are so many options that i'm not sure what do to. Thought i'd see if you might have some advice.
"Well. a lot depends on your time frame," he explained. If you're looking short term, say one to twelve months, I'd recommend CDs. They are safe and you can always get your money in an energency."
CDs. no one had mentioned those on the investment shows I had watched. Since no one had any they wanted to sell me on the hyped business shows I suspected they might be just the thing.
We chatted some more, I thanked him and returned to my quarters. I got online and researched CDs. There wer many, as it turned out, to choose from.
I decided I would experiment with investing like a monkey boy.
Soon winging my way were Shania Twain, Eric Clapton, 50 cent, Carrie Underwood and many many more fine CDs.
Soon, my inexhaustible expense account notwithstanding, I would be rich.

REDOMMENDED